Familiarity

The morning seemed extremely familiar. Standing under the running shower, the struggle to reach my upper back and clean them was familiarly difficult. So was the feeling when I boarded the metro for my office. I was holding the complete work of Kafka, as I had been doing for the entire last month. But somehow today I was feeling pretty hollow from inside. I stood at the corner of the sliding door of the metro. A small kid was ambling very cutely holding her mother’s legs who was sitting on the crowded bench. All of a sudden the kid started walking. Snuggling through the forests of legs in the crowded metro he arrived to me. With few small little fingers in her mouth she stared at me with those clear watery eyes. She seemed to have stumbled with all grave awkwardness as if an alien creature is standing in front of her. I was already feeling quite hollow. Now I was even pushed further more to the space of my uncomfortable self. Surreptitiously, the inner struggle floated up again.

I started nagging as usual. Am I doing something meaningful? Am I doing what I am liking? Am I liking what I am doing? All these useless questions started flying around.

The metro reached Kirti Nagar where I was supposed to get down. Surprising the kid with her mom was about to get down on the same station. She was holding her fingers and crying. I wished my mom was here. I wanted to cry holding my mom’s fingers.

I hired an auto rickshaw and reached office with the familiar hollowness.

Tring!!! Tring!!! “INR xx,xxx.00 deposited to A/c No xx8702 towards NEFT Cr-UTIB000***-xxxxxxxx-Kinjal Roy AXTB161768739092 VAL 02_MAY-16. Clr Bal is INR x,xx,xxx.15 subject to clearing.” Ohh!! It was my salary day!!!

Welcome back Mr.Roy!!. Welcome to the NECROPOLIS!!!

NB: Last night I was shopping at a mall with a girl I met on a popular dating App. After I left her, I took a hand pulled rickshaw back to my place.

The puller  was a lean dark skinned old man. He charged 30 bucks which was quite lower than the normal rate. I put 3 bills of ten rupees on his palm. I sensed it was unnaturally warm. He was having fever. I took him to my room, gave him some water and snacks. At the time of leaving I put another bill of 500 bucks. He wished me. But the bubble started growing. It burst while I was entering my office on the next day. I was feeling better!